sometimes something bad happens to you and you don’t really realize how much you’ve let it consume you until a year goes by and you look back on that time and realize it hardened something within you. it made you different. your reactions become rash and almost crazy because you don’t know how to let go. you cannot control what’s happened so you desperately try to control what’s happening now – control what you can because life cannot truly be controlled as all things happen unexpectedly. you desperately seek for answers to override the answers you’ll never get. you force people to the brink and challenge them to deliver the truth instead of excuses because you cannot bear the idea of not knowing. you cannot live in silent space for it brings you back to the moment that cannot be undone, to the moment where you lost everything. silence becomes not a moment of peace but a form of poison, that further kills you from within. you overcompensate in your actions to never have to relive such pain but it only makes it harder when people depart. you become suffocated by the bad to the point that you lose your self-control and suffocate others because you cannot handle the loss. it does not make you weak or psychotic; it makes you troubled by something so great- another could never truly understand. it is impossible to live your life freely when you are anchored by something so tragic.
I put up this quote I came up with on my personal Facebook page and it sparked an interesting conversation where I believe there was a misunderstanding and mis-communication – nevertheless it created two sides of subjects that lead into one another.
My status was as follows:
you’re gonna do things that are not like you & some of those things are gonna be mistakes but there’s a first time for everything so let it go. you’re not the worst thing you’ve done or the things you do in momentary judgment lapses. your mistakes do not define you. you define yourself by what you do starting today, not yesterday.
comment #1: i disagree with this…everything that you live is everything that you are…the good, the bad and the ugly…in there is nothing wrong with that…
my response: I’m not saying the good and the bad aren’t a part of you .. I’m saying people change. Just because you make a mistake or do the wrong thing doesn’t mean that action should own the rest of your life. That does not determine who we are as people, we determine that with changes and current actions- not with things we can do nothing about.
comment #2: It absolutely does, determine who you are…those are the reasons you change…
my response: you’re not understanding what I’m saying .. It is useless to live your life recounting the mistakes you’ve made or dwelling in regret. you make a mistake you let it go. that mistake is not who you are. what comes from it perhaps becomes apart of who you are, just as your past is a part of your life but you’re not your past. that doesn’t define you either. but like I said before ^^ you are not the worst thing you’ve done – if one wrong determines who you are then change wouldn’t even be possible. you can become who you want to be unless you allow a mistake or wrong decision or pain or a bad moment to consume you.
comment #3 (different person): Mistakes are lessons, moving forward in a positive direction is a must. Being crucified for your mistakes should never be done.. There is no perfect human being, and unless someone can step up to the plate and tell me they are and have never made a mistake then and only then can you judge anyone.. Just keeping it real.. Allison I agree with you 100%…
I wanted to post this to see what others thought of this? Life is a controversial subject and everyone views it differently. There is no right or wrong way, just various opinions and beliefs. My argument was to clarify what I was saying in this status as well as to back up what I was saying. It was not simply a status where the language looked beautiful – I agree with the words I write and if they are not my own, I either agree with them or they make me open my mind to a new perspective which in turn is a beautiful thing.
there is no guide to life but here’s for starters..
step number 1. trust yourself.
step number 2. make your own decisions.
step number 3. take a lot of pictures. capture the moments that become apart of you.
step number 4. love. completely. it doesn’t matter if you’ve been hurt before.
step number 5. take risks.
step number 6. make a bucket list & start crossing things off. NOW.
step number 7. don’t feel guilty putting yourself first sometimes.
step number 8. do the things that scare you.
step number 9. stand up for yourself.
step number 10. fight for your dreams.
step number 11. real friends do not force their advice/opinions down your throat. they listen. they’re there.
step number 12. realize & know you can only control yourself. you cannot control or expect from others- to do what you would.
step number 13. do good.
step number 14. you can change who you are, you can change anything about your life if you have the will and desire to.
step number 15. travel.
step number 16. stay true to you. if you don’t stand by your morals and keep the promises you make to yourself, then how can someone take you seriously.
step number 17. you can’t make a friend a good one by holding onto what they were. you can’t make a person feel something by holding on too tight.
step number 18. be happy. do what makes you happy.
step number 19. sometimes you have to be your own hero. the strength is in you, you just have to find it.
step number 20. the problem with the world is those who turn a blind eye- who stay silent, who do nothing.
step number 21. you will get hurt. take the chance anyway.
step number 22. be honest- not simply with others but with yourself.
step number 23. don’t waste time.
step number 24. notice, embrace, acknowledge the beauty in this world. it’s all around you.
step number 25. see things through a new perspective. let yourself be challenged. and let it change the way you think.
step number 26. you are not what you do. you are not the mistakes you’ve made.
step number 27. do not judge for we are all different, with flaws, who make mistakes, who sin differently. you don’t have to like everyone but you should never judge anyone.
step number 28. words are far more powerful then anyone cares to admit.
step number 29. majority are quick to believe the bad and hesitant to believe the good. don’t be like this.
step number 30. believe in the unbelievable.
step number 31. don’t allow anything to harden your heart.
step number 32. try to find the good in every situation. be appreciative, even if things didn’t go as you would have liked. try to.
step number 33. do more than merely survive. have an impact on someone or leave your print in life.
step number 34. don’t wait. fight. but remember, you’re not the only one with a strong heart and fists.
step number 35. cultivate your curiosities, your interests, your dreams.
step number 36. there’s no guide to life. the best advice i can give you is to live. take it all in. we lean through experiences- trying, complicated, & often painful as these experiences might be – we would not be who we are, where are, or know what we do without them.
never allow anyone to make you feel like you don’t deserve to be loved. perhaps it is them who do not know how to love.
if you’re constantly pointing out someone’s flaws, & putting them down, and constantly seeing the bad in them- you should know that hurts the person you’re doing it to, even if deep down they know your words hold no truth – you’re hurting them. but you’re not actually defining who they are. your inability to see selfless actions, and beautiful imperfections, and unconditional love and your own selfish actions, judgmental words, and cowardly behavior defines your character. not theirs. when a person is good to you, you should be good to that person. not because it’s what they expect and not because you owe them something but because it’s decent, it’s human.
I not only love quotes but I love making up my own quotes so there’s a good chance, you’re going to see a lot on here that are my own. if they’re not I will be sure to quote them so you can tell the difference.
my quote for today is: (actually this gives me the idea to have a quote everyday 😉
when it comes to giving, there are two kinds of people you should do for:
1- those who deserve it. and..
2- those who cannot give you anything back.