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the thing with family, friendships, relationships alike is that when you go through turmoil and fight through wars, if you don’t wash away the residue and leave some lingering, it’ll follow you. when people consistently bring up your past mistakes, choices they didn’t like, choices that “weren’t right” as per their definition of wrong and right, you can never move forward with that person. and who would want to put efforts into a person who only sees bad, flaws, mistakes, pain, fights. when someone pushes their opinions and choices and how they live their lives onto you by making you feel guilty about how you live your life, giving you ultimatums, not respecting how you choose to live your life, they become resented. 

there comes a point in everyone’s life, where we have to find a separating line between ourselves as individuals, and parents, friendships, family. love is a little different. there is a natural separation that occurs where we control our own lives and we need to voice it, otherwise the manipulation, the guilt trips, the misery will never end. the more someone tries to push you where their push is not warranted, the further they’re going to push you away. 

I wish you’d see that but we’ll never have the chance to get better because you’ll never let me live my life my way, without making me feel guilty for it.

-Allison Ryder