this whole situation gave me the balls to stand up to everyone. only one thing hurts me right now, everything else is pretty simple – throughout everything, there’s been people who supported me or people who came around to support me in the end – so family, friends, ex’s, etc. you can either support my choice of company, my choice of life, who I’m becoming, where my heart is or not – because these six months changed me permanently – you can accept who I am now or you can leave. honestly, I lost people who meant everything to me – even if it’s temporary – so even if it hurts, if you cannot accept my choices then you can go because I’m not going to hide the broken pieces and pretend I don’t want certain people in my life to make anyone happy or comfortable. I’ve never been a liar and I’m not going to start now. not even ten minutes ago, my ex blew up a situation of a relationship he was in 1014 except that’s when he was with me, and it doesn’t even hurt. that’s how immune I’ve become to a lot of people and things. so no, I’m not the woman I was yesterday or last year, I’ve changed in the pain and the silence and the heartbreak. I found my voice, my best friend, my heartbeat, and my family this year. I’ve felt a lot of pain but I’ve established a lot of truths also. I’ve been my worst version of myself and my best due to situations but in reality, no one brings that out truly – it’s your own choices – people cannot force your hand. I’ve owned up to my fuckups and my mistakes and I will blatantly tell you shit you won’t like. But I’ve lived a long time for everyone else and upon rare occasions gotten it back and now I want to be who I really am, the person I want to be, and I can only hope that those I trusted and who were there through my worst, will stay for my best because they’re the ones I want in my life always.